What Turning 30 Means to Me
Today is my last day. My last day in my twenties I mean. I feel like I should be doing something magnificent on my last day. But today is just an ordinary day. I don't mean to make it sound boring. A day running around with my daughter is far from boring. In fact, I captured some of the cutest video's of her today! But back to the topic at hand. I'm so easily side tracked when asked about my daughter. Oh…you didn't ask? Oh. Anyway, where was I. Ah yes. My twenties.
It truly was a good decade. Being the third decade in my life I must say I'm pretty proud of where I am. It was the beginning of this decade that I met my husband at Washington State University. In this decade I lived in 7 different places, 3 different cities, 1 state. What can I say, I love this state. I've also graduated from college, watched my husband graduate twice, worked in three different industries, gotten married, gone to Jamaica (ya mon), gone to Paris (oui, oui), had a baby (oh my gosh, Lexie did the cutest thing the other…sorry…side tracked again), opened an Etsy shop, taken up scrapbooking again, become a stay at home mom…wow. Looking back I really can't complain, can I?
But still, I can't help but feel a little whiney about turning 30. It just seems so adult. I mean come on, I can't even say ADORBS anymore! chYeah, that's what they told me on the Today show! Well I'm going to keep on saying it. I just thought I'd put that out there. I feel like I should have it all figured out. Like I have to close the door to my childhood and open the door to adulthood.
Going into my thirties, I am a lot more observant of my surroundings than when I was going into my twenties. Back then (oh geez, did I really just say that) I was a lot little more carefree. Dare I say, a little naive. I think we all were. And if you don't think you were, just tell me you were anyway. Make a girl feel better. No seriously though, I was in college living in an apartment with a crazy roommate. And when I say crazy, I mean W.A.C.K.O. But you don't want to hear about that. I had a crush on this guy in one of my classes who *gasp* lived across the street from me. In case you were wondering, this guy is now my husband. I worried about if he was going to be at the party I was going to on Friday night. I worried about my roommate stealing my twinkle lights I had hanging in my dining room…which she ended up doing. Worriment VALID. I worried about what people thought about me if I ate by myself in The Cub (which people did all the time so that was dumb). I worried about missing out on a fun party because I was stuck in design studio till the wee hours of the morning. I worried about the silly things a young, newly independent college girl going into her twenties would worry about.
Going into my thirties, I worry about my daughter having thin hair like me. I really do. More realistically and a little less shallow, I worry about her being one of the many child abduction victims we hear about too frequently. I worry about her making friends when she's older (though how can she not. Have you SEEN my daughter?!) or being the victim of bullying. I worry about her skinning her knee one day and what if I'm not there to kiss it better. I worry about finances, like most American's. It's tough living off of one income. But when daycare is almost as much as one paycheck, doesn't it just make sense to stay home? I worry about those kids down the street who's parents care more about their drugs than keeping their children from running out in the street. True story right there. But all this worrying is getting me anxious. Let's talk about what I'm looking forward to.
Going into my thirties, my goal is to complete this beautiful family my husband and I have started. I hope to give my daughter and future children the sort of childhood our parents gave us. I hope to create wonderful memories that they will later reminisce about and say "Remember when we did that? That was awesome!" (yes I think that "awesome" will still be the perfect word to describe an awesome event when my kids are old enough to reminisce and say "awesome"). I hope to settle into a house that we will raise our children in, and make that house a home. I hope to instill greatness, creativity, and wonderment in their lives so they can grow up to make the lives better of everyone else around them. I hope to continue a marriage full of graciousness, love, and compassion, and to make time for date nights and gotta-get-away-these-kids-are-driving-me-crazy getaways. I also hope to expand my creative business and one day take it from being a "fun money" income to a full second income. I want to be one of those people who make their passion their career.
Yeah, I'd say it's pretty great to be going into my thirties. It took me writing this all out to really believe that. I mean, it's better than the alternative isn't it? Some may think I'm being a little dramatic…wouldn't be the first time. You might be saying, get over it! You're life isn't ending! Nope. It's just the opposite. A new phase is just beginning. I'm starting my next thirty years. Anyone else now have that Tim McGraw song stuck in their heads? No? Just me? Ok then.
Going into my thirties, I'm not going to close the door to childhood. Instead I am going to tuck my childhood safely inside a special place in my heart so I can pull it out whenever I'm feeling nostalgic. And when my kids ask me what it was like when I was growing up, I'll proudly tell my stories. I thank my parents for letting me just be a kid. I think about how lucky my sisters and I were growing up. How good we had it. But in my thirties, it will be my turn to be the foundation of someone else's childhood memories. It will be my turn to pass on words of wisdom and maybe, just maybe, keep some naivety in their lives so they could stay a child for as long as possible.
Cheers to the next 30 years!
